I've been wanting to change the the words on my wall from our birthdays (Tt is for two...). I wanted something to celebrate Christmas but didn't feel like "merry & bright" or even "love, joy & peace" hit the mark this year. Yesterday I found the words, or I should rather say names, for my wall. The names that Jesus was called in the Bible in the book of Isaiah. I am so encouraged by my new reminder of Christmas.
As I proudly texted off a picture to my sister, she was sitting outside her girls' dance studio about four hours away. The girls were worshiping God through dance to the following song. Both my sister and I couldn't help but be overwhelmed by the moment. Two sisters, miles apart and yet being comforted & wrapped in the same blanket of God's love and care.
This is the song my sister was listening to (at this site on YouTube): http://youtu.be/uuDI-sk2nJU
These are His names on my wall (and what I was staring at):
God is with me. I'm not alone. What better thing is there to know that I have companionship on this journey? I have the God of the universe with me... how absolutely, amazingly incredible is that!
Forever in the past, present & future, I have a nurturing, caring, loving Daddy. He has always been. He is with me right now as I'm writing this note on my couch. There will never be an end to Him. He will not run out or expire. He will always be. I am His precious baby girl.
All power & control are in His hands. He rules over all. And as His child, He is more than able to do all things. He can see the big picture when I can't even see my foot to make a next step. And He's God... the Big Guy, all powerful, all knowing, Creator, the Alpha & Omega, the great I am!
Both I and my heart are so extremely important to Him. He is moulding and shaping my heart and soul into a new figure that looks more like Him. It hurts to be carved, broken and transformed but it is for the best and He will be in control of and perfect each cut. And I will become whole and complete and perfect as I let him discipline and heal and recreate me.
Prince of Peace
My heart fearfully fights & flee. He makes me bow my knee (or just simply collapse from the exhaustion of battle) before Him. He must reign. His reign does not incite trembling or terror but rather love, justice and awe. His peace is foundational to our existence.
My new wall art & encouragement (thanks to my hubby for helping me cut out & place letters)
What I Have Survived Since Feb 12, 2013
(in 228 Appointments)
IVs (successful) x 81
Bloodwork (successful) x 85
IVs or Bloodwork (unsuccessful) x 18
Biopsies x 13 (I think)
Chemo x 18 cycles including:
IV Chemo x 29 doses
Oral Chemo x 736 pills
Bone strengthening infusions x 23
Injections x 10
Brain radiation x 5
Other radiation x 3
Tattoos x 6
MRI x 4
CT x 16
Ultrasound x 3
Xray x 8
ECHO x 1
Surgery x 2
Minor surgery x 1
Days in hospital x 9
ER visits x 3
Parking Ticket x one given incorrectly & almost another one