"I'm Going To Lose My Hair?" 2/15
But I love my curls... and not in an incredibly vain way. They're unique to me and just such a distinctive part of me and my personality. Maybe I'll be one of the few that only loses a little hair or doesn't lose any at all. Here's to hoping...
"Whatever It Takes To Get Me Better" 2/21
The silly thing about losing my hair is that it's not a sign that I'm sick. It's a side effect of the chemo and so the stuff I'm wanting to get me better is going to make me look bad/sick. My hair will grow again... and I know that. It's just going to take a very long time to get back to the curls that I'm used to. If this is what it takes to get me better, then I guess so be it.
"It's Started" 3/7
A lot of my hair fell out in the shower & I got a hair brush full of hair today. I don't think I like this at all. I'm starting to look like I'm "sick" now. My head is itchy and sort of feels like perpetual pins and needles. The irrational side of me doesn't want to wash my hair because then I'll lose more. I don't want this to happen and I'm a little scared.
"Chopped" 3/8
I couldn't handle all of that hair coming out so I took "control", got a short haircut, and tried on some wigs. While the cut wasn't the best and my hair is short, I was able to cut off my curls in a way that it could be used for a partial wig for me or someone else. Cutting my hair is taking control & losing control all at the same time. I'm not quite sure what I think of this hairdo but it's what I have to do.
"Can It Get Any Finer?" 3/18
And the answer is yes! So I just keep losing more hair. The haircut looked great compared to what I have now. My scalp is totally visible; my hairline has receded even farther (I'm looking more like my dad every day... but don't tell him). I need to have a vacuum next to my spot on the couch. When I turn over in bed at night, I'm choking my own hair that's fallen out on my pillow. This is just getting disgusting.
"No More" 3/19
There's no going back. It needs to be shaved. I'm sick of the hair falling out. Put the brush, shampoo, conditioner, mousse & gel into storage (at least I can save a little money in this area this year). Bring out the wig and wig stand (oh well, there goes that financial savings). It's time to get rid of these flimsy, failing locks.
"It's Done" 3/20
Xhevat and I shaved my head. I cried.
You are amazing... brave... honest... beautiful. We love you! You ARE fighting, in so many ways. So proud of you cousin (in-law:))!
ReplyDeleteKrista, your hair is not what makes you the beauty you are...what makes you such a rare and precious beauty is your heart, your spirit, your grace, and your faith. You are a treasure. May you find comfort in the knowledge that the God of the universe holds you in the hollow of His hand...and that you (and yours!) are lifted up in the prayers of the saints. xo.
ReplyDeleteI love you with or without your hair, and really I think you will look exceptional with a bald head your have the scalp and skull for it and the bone structure to boot. They say when your hair does grow back it grows back even curlier. XOXOXO
ReplyDeleteDear Krista - You have such an eloquent voice describing what this loss means to you. Thank you for letting us inside this experience. Thank you too for posting the beautiful photos of you and Matias. As always I am thinking of you. Joy
ReplyDeleteThat was a very brave act, Krista! Well, it’s true that there’s nothing to worry about chopping off your hair. While it can make you uncomfortable at first, you would get used to it eventually. And your hair will grow back in time after this particular journey is through. All the best!
ReplyDeleteGlenn Lowe @ Knight and Sanders