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Just another 4 hr ER trip today. Bloodwork, X-rays, fluids, pain meds, antinauseant. Only three pokes in total today... so that's decent (seven pokes in seven days this week!). My symptoms couldn't all be accounted for... but such is my life with cancer.

They sent me home with an IV hoping that it will it will last until I have an MRI tomorrow. Xhevat and flushed it tonight. Then Wednesday I have another appointment with a new radiation oncologist.

We've had a bunch of really big ups and downs this week and are emotionally and physically and spiritually tired. There's lots to absorb and work through and we don't want to cheat the process of working through these emotions. At the same time, life is continuing... our marriage, Matias growing up, Xhevat's job and his responsibilities, Advent & Christmas, family near and far, and just the regular joys and struggles of life. Please pray into these areas of our life.

I'm learning to expect the unexpected with my health... while living in the reality of my disease process... But yet all with the knowledge that God can do all things. 

As I left the house today, I said my goodbyes to my son, house, and my dog... just in case. I set out my boy's pyjamas so that they'd be ready for him even if mama wasn't home tonight. And I also reemphasized the fact that I still ams a full code. I still feel like I've got more in me to give. I'm getting more placest to involved in... So Daddy, Loving Father, help live more for you with the peole in my life. Help me to become a reflection of the you. 

Very glad I also got to say my hi's again this afternoon when I got home, for my neighbour who took care of my son while she had family visitors herself  and for my parents who are here to take care of all of us.

What a crazy, confusing world we live in. So happy to be going to sleep in my own bed with my family close tonight.

Good night world. 

My IV